In an interview on CBN Michelle Wilson delved into the rocky start of the Duck Dynasty nuptials and how Miss Kay’s faith in God saved their marriage and quite likely Phil’s life… physically and spiritually. Fourteen million people a week know and love the great Patriarch Phil Robertson on Duck Dynasty, but few are aware how he came to know God and develop that unshaking faith that has stirred America’s viewers to keep coming back for more. I thought you might be interested in the circumstances that turned this man to God. I know I wondered how God turned a duck call into a duck dynasty.
Miss Kay as they call her with respect is well known for her cooking but as you read the interview below you will find she was the glue, the mother hen that got her flock to straighten up and fly right.
You are on one of the highest rated tv reality series, can you tell us why you think that is happening? God is blessing us, maybe because He knows we are going to still talk about Him. Kay grew up in a small town in Ida Louisiana just 300 population and one red light which makes the town very proud. Her grandmother’s home was a source of comfort. She remembers there was always cooking going on, pots on the stove with bubbling and rattling lids. Her grandmother had told her emphatically, one woman, one man, for one life and divorce was not an option. She took those words to heart and her marriage.
Kay and Phil met in high school she was 14 and a cheerleader, he was 16, played baseball, was a quarterback and loved hunting. According to Kay it was love at first sight for her. I don’t know if he would say that. O’ yeah, I like the way that looks, she said about him. He worked in the oilfield as a roughneck, his dad was a driller.
Kay and Phil married and had a son, Alan. Phil became a teacher but wasn’t ready for the responsibility of being a father. He began drinking and running around wild and had a violent temper. I don’t want anybody to stay through an abusive thing and I had some abuse there and that was one thing. The abuse was only when he was drunk but the words were the worse part. I’m not saying he never did anything physical because there was a time when he drank real moonshine and he did do some physical abuse.
Why didn’t you just leave? At that point you had gone through so much. I guess I was a loyal person, I made the vow to God for better or worse to death do us part. I’m convinced if I hadn’t stayed with him he would be dead.
The couple had two more sons before Phil left teaching and started managing a bar. He continued drinking and seeing other women. He came home drunk one night and accused Kay of cheating on him. The abuse had become unbearable and she completely lost hope. She was crying in the bathroom of the trailer when she thought I just want to go to sleep and never wake up. She even looked in the medicine cabinet to see if there was something to make her sleep in there. In that minute she could hear sliding of little slippers on the floor. It was Alan and Jason and then Willie. Alan came in and said “Mom don’t cry anymore God is going to take care of us.” She said a light went on in her head. She thought what would happen to those three little souls living with a drunk if something happened to me. She prayed God help me, just help me.
The next day she went to visit a pastor. He asked her “If you died right now would you go to heaven?” She said by all means I would fly there. I’ve lived with this drunk for 10 years and my Grandmother said to fight for my marriage and I should have earned my way to heaven by now. Then he asked her “do you have peace?” She says, now that’s the problem I don’t have any of that. He shared the gospel with her and she realized she cannot earn her way to heaven only Jesus can do that and He did. He earned it for me and I have to go through Him. She put her faith in Him and confessed He is her Savior and was baptized. She knew right then she had help and wasn’t alone, He was living in her. (I say He just answered her prayer for help from the trailer the night she contemplated suicide).
She shared her faith with Phil who called her a Holy Roller and kicked her and the 3 kids out of the house. She moves into an apartment and instead of being angry she believes God for the best. She explains what she did next was the most important lesson she ever learned. I told my kids your dad has a good heart but the devil is controlling him and living inside. One day the devil will be gone. For now don’t hate your dad, hate the devil. Then she had them pray that dad would find Jesus.
Three months later at work Kay saw Phil in the parking lot sitting in his truck with big tears streaming down his face. “He said I can’t eat or sleep I have to have my family back. I won’t drink anymore I’m through.” Phil you have said that many times before, you can’t do it by yourself you need somebody to help. He said “are you talking about God?” Kay said yes. He said “I don’t know how to find Him.”
Kay introduced him to her Pastor and the two talked for hours. The next day Phil now 28 yrs. old, went to church. He accepted Christ and was baptized and Kay and the boys got to witness the event. It was the beginning of a new life… a new Phil. Shortly after this they had their 4thson. Phil was attending church, teaching Bible studies and even Sunday school. He told everyone he met about how His Savior gave him a second chance.
Decades later his son Jason told everyone how God used his dad to lead 100’s of people to Christ. Then he talked about his mom and how special she is to their family. He said “I want to tell you something right now. You wouldn’t have had any of that…nothing if it hadn’t been for my mom, nothing at all and you wouldn’t know about Jesus right now either. It was my Mom’s courage to stay with a hard marriage and stand by that commitment. She’s my first most courageous person.” Kay says isn’t that good? God pulled me through and…my Grandmother.
What do you want people to know about you? A little embarrassed and humble Kay tells a story. We were asked to speak one time and the Preacher said to her “do you know what I think about when I see you?” What? “You stand by your man through everything. You stood by your man and kept your word to God and look at the fruit it produced in your children and grandchildren.” I guess you could say that about me, I stand by my man. (that’s actually an old country song)
Kay says she has told God and her family, If we ever forget where we come from I pray to God we lose it all; we just go right back to where we belong because we don’t want to think “this is our life” from now on. (She’s referring to the tv show) I don’t know how long this will last but I want to go right back and not miss a beat. End of interview.
When you read her story is there any doubt that Phil would have answered the questions in the GQ interview any differently? I don’t think so. In fact these trials through his life seemed to have prepared him for this very interview and these very questions like it was a test that was inevitable for him to take one day. Like Kay said if it ever gets about the money and not God, then just take it all away.
In conclusion, I’d say don’t ever be discouraged or lose hope when life’s trials come up. It’s better to be thankful for them and count yourself blessed as they strengthen you for the task ahead and your walk with God. Each time we lean on God to get us through we grow to another level in trust of Him. Phil and Kay have grown together in their walk with God and have their ducks in a row (excuse the pun) of what’s really important in life, and the order they belong in. God first then family then the viewers…