In this week’s episode of The Twilight Obama Zone, the “greens” have won a victory: Americans are driving fuel efficient cars and buying less gasoline. But wait! That means . . . less in federal gas taxes. Oh no! In the Zone taxes always have to go UP! We want to have our green cake and tax it too! We want more taxes AND we want people to drive less. We want to square the circle. We want contradictions to work out to our advantage BOTH ways.

What to do? Never fear, we denizens of the Twilight Obama Zone have a new scheme to add INTENDED consequences to the unintended consequence of lower gas tax revenues. Remember, in the Twilight Obama Zone common sense does not operate and the laws of economics have been repealed.

Weekly Standard reporter Ethan Epstein reports that “greener-than-thou Representative Earl Blumenauer, D-Oregon, . . . wants to require the Treasury to ‘study’ ways to replace the gas tax with a vehicle-miles traveled (VMT) tax.”

So, all of you smug Prius-owning gas sippers would now pay just as much in highway taxes as the biggest SUV, mile for mile. Just when you were putting fewer emissions into the air, just when you were saving the planet, we have decided that . . . wait for it . . . you aren’t paying your fair share! No good deed goes unpunished, even if the deed is green.

But wait! There’s More! In the Twilight Obama Zone there’s always more! Now what would you pay? What would you pay in loss of freedom and privacy? To collect the data on how many miles you’ve driven, the government plans to install a tracking device on every car. In the Zone, we know where you are, every minute of every day. We are the government, and you don’t need no stinking privacy!

There’s still more! By gradually raising the taxes on miles driven, the Green Gestapo can make it too expensive to drive to work. This will force you to use one of their cherished ideas: mass transit. By funneling the citizens through the checkpoints of bus stops and train stations, they can control who travels and how often, just like they do now in the airports. Flashback: WWII movies. The Gestapo (TSA) checking everyone’s papers at train stations.

Epstein notes that the novelist J.G. Ballard wrote that the personal car “enshrines a basically old-fashioned idea: freedom.” Get in your own car any time you want and go anywhere you want. You decide. Not in the Twilight Obama Zone. Go only when the government funded mass transit is running, only if the government decides to run it, only where they decide to run it. We decide. We control where you go, when you go and how often you go.

We don’t need no stinking gas taxes by the gallon! We can always print the money.
We want control.

Michael McCarthy is the author of the Conservative political thriller novel The Noah Option, about a government in the near future seizing more and more control. Available in paperback at / and on Kindle at Amazon. Michael is also associate producer and occasional interviewer for the conservative talk show The Don Smith Show airing Saturdays at 12 noon.

Sources: The Weekly Standard