Sad news out of South America this week – cancer in Venezuela died after a long struggle with Hugo Chavez. Sean Penn’s moustache is at half-mast, while Oliver Stone and Danny Glover are spending the rest of the week in mourning, counting they money they’ve accumulated in the very country which coincidentally was Hugo Chavez’ sworn enemy.

North Korea has threatened to nullify the armistice which ended The Korean War if the United States and South Korea carry on with joint military drills. Over 10,000 US and 200,000 South Korean troops are taking part and officials in Pyongyang say unless it stops, they will cancel the Korean War ceasefire agreement. Not only that, Kim Jong-un has vowed to launch a nuclear attack on Los Angeles and San Francisco, calling it a “pre-emptive strike”. Wow – way to go Rodman.

By keeping his filibuster against the confirmation of John Brennan going through prime time, Rand Paul forced ABC, CBS, and NBC to actually cover the issue of Eric Holder’s refusal to answer straight questions on drones. Meanwhile, John McCain called Rand Paul’s efforts; “a political stunt.” Of course, he said the same thing about The Monroe Doctrine.

But the big controversy is how some Senators had dinner with Obama instead of supporting Paul Rand, who needed some time to rest his voice during the filibuster. Ted Cruz, Mike Lee and Jerry Moran came in to give Paul a break. Even Democratic Senator Ron Wyden of Oregon joined in the filibuster. Meanwhile, John McCain went to eat dinner with the President, and proposed going before 4:30PM, which would also help with the sequester cuts. It’s a win-win.

Senate Minority Leader Mitch McConnell’s re-election campaign this week put up a video of a person wearing a Mitch McConnell mask, dancing to the “Harlem Shake.” Now there’s one way to get rid of a stupid fad.
A new policy that was created in consultation with groups which include Planned Parenthood of Illinois, will require Chicago Public School kindergarteners to get sex education beginning in 2015. The children, or as Planned Parenthood describes them; “the ones that got away” are to receive instruction on “healthy choices” to “guide them throughout their lives.” The program will be available to kids as young as nineteen trimesters.

Private companies hired more people than expected in February and suggests economic activity is picking up in the US. Employers added 198,000 jobs last month, beating the expected increase of 170,000. Especially good was construction hiring, where payrolls rose by 21,000 jobs. I blame George Bush.

Can we finally admit we elected someone based on the color of their skin? I’m talking, of course, about John Boehner… Orange is in – have you checked out Snookie?
Washington State Representative Ed Orcutt says riding bicycles causes more pollution than cars, because the increased heart rate and respiration from riding a bike results in larger emissions of carbon dioxide from the rider. Using this logic, people in the backseats of parked cars would really be the big polluters I would think. I have no evidence to back up my claim, but kinda like Ed there in Washington, that never stops me. The whole incident has inspired Al Gore to make a new documentary, entitled; “Lance Armstrong Hates Earth.”