NBC’s Sisterhood of the Traveling Pantsuit?
According to Variety; Bob Greenblatt, head of NBC Entertainment, says the Peacock network will soon unveil a slate of high-profile projects they’re calling their; “year of improvement.” Greenblatt mentioned two of those projects were a miniseries about Hillary Clinton and a remake of the movie; “Rosemary’s Baby” – a psychological thriller originally made in the 1960’s about the birth of a baby girl who turns out to be Satan’s daughter. Which actually makes sense, because wouldn’t Rosemary’s Baby be all grown up now and be right around Hillary’s age? The story of the mini-series entitled; “Hilary” will follow Ms. Clinton from the period in 1998 during the Monica Lewinsky scandal through the present day. In other words, from Hilary yelling orders at Bill to “stand-up”; to her giving orders in Libya to “stand-down”?
Due to chatter about potential terrorist threats, State Department officials say the United States will close an unspecified number of embassies around the world because of “security concerns…” Boy, talk about closing the barn door after Hillary is out…
New Jersey Gov. Chris Christie has no interest in making nice with fellow Republican Sen. Rand Paul even after Senator Paul extended an olive branch to the governor over their public sparring. After Christie said that Paul’s libertarian approach to foreign policy was “dangerous” in a speech, the Senator invited Christie to have a beer on Fox News. But Governor Christie was having none of it, saying; “I don’t really have time for that at the moment.” Christie went on to call Paul’s offer to have a beer, “juvenile.” In response, Rand Paul agreed his offer was silly and a more serious and realistic offer should have been put forth to get he and Chris Christie together: A porterhouse, two stuffed-potatoes and a case of Old Milwaukee. With Bacon. Duh.
Jimmy McMillan, the man who became known for his campaign tagline “The rent is too damn high” announced via Twitter that he’s officially endorsing Anthony Weiner for Mayor of New York. His new campaign is “The Pants are Too-Damn Low.” McMillan offered some advice as well that if Weiner needs “another woman” he can provide one for him, and suggested Weiner create a business out of his “Carlos Danger” pseudonym. Sounds to me like he should be pushing a write-in campaign for Carlos Danger and maybe the price of crack is too damn low as well?
It turns out that rap singer Kanye West could be one of the reasons why Rolling Stone is getting so much crap for their cover featuring Boston Marathon bombing suspect Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. Rumor has it that Kanye was originally supposed to be on their August cover to promote his new album, entitled, “Yeezus.” Why do they still say “album?” Do kids know what an album is? Anyway, Kanye dropped out of the interview at the last second without notice or reason, so Rolling Stone had to come up with another idea for a cover and blam! – out came the infamous glamor / bomber issue. What a choice.
Major Nidal Hasan, the Fort Hood Shooter released several pages of letters and documents in which he renounces his citizenship, military oath, explains his relationship with radical cleric Anwar al-Awlaki and basically lays out the fact that he carried out a terrorist act against the United States. Most of the letters also include the acronym “SoA,” which stands for “Soldier of Allah.” Seems to me he’s more than a little miffed at being treated like a disgruntled mail carrier who committed workplace violence. Hasan’s business card, which also lists him as “SoA,” was found in his apartment after the shooting. Doesn’t every terrorist need a good business card with a snappy title? Hasan reiterates that he was very careful to yell “Allahu Akbar” before the massacre as to not be confused with fired employees who come back the next day and kick their bosses ass or pissed off musicians who trash their hotel rooms. Next up, Hasan plans to bring a homemade banner to court on which he painted, “I’m A Frickin’ Terrorist Eric – Come On!”
Brian David Mitchell, who kidnapped Elizabeth Smart when she was 14 and spent nine months raping and torturing her, has been beaten to within an inch of his life in prison recently. Mitchell, who has been serving his time in a high security prison in Tuscon, Arizona is not real popular there for some reason and some of the prisoners have taken exception to his crimes – many of whom credit their own predicament in part to their own abuse growing up. Anyway, Mitchell got his face and ribs kicked and punched in until he was a bloody pulp and I can’t imagine why guards didn’t break it up until the last possible moment. A push to make it a national holiday is forthcoming. Perhaps everyday can be “Beat Brian David Mitchell to a Bloody Pulp Day” until scumbags like him everywhere get the message.
So anywhoozer, back to the Hilary Miniseries: I have a couple casting suggestions for NBC: Charlie Sheen as Bill Clinton; John Goodman as Monica Lewinsky (although this could cause Sheen to drop out, in which case they’d have to get Ashton Kutcher), Barney Frank as Candy Crowley (that was mean, although I’m not sure to whom), Ron Glass as Eric Holder and Don Johnson as me. More? okay:
Beevis as Anthony Weiner, Lindsay Lohan as Susan McDougal, Kathy Griffin as Paula Jones and the great Vincent D’Onofrio as Roger Clinton, John Kerry, Joe Biden or really any number of establishment politicians or Hilary cohorts… Stay tuned.
Rodney Lee Conover is a writer / performer, living in Southern California’s Mohave Desert
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