Recently, a friend of mine (Erick Erickson) had the nerve to insinuate that men and women were inherently different. He was met with accusations of “sexism” and “being judgmental.” Similarly, a couple of months ago, I wrote a column at FoxNews about how my wife and I made the choice to wait until marriage. Some people claimed that they felt “judged.” I’m okay with that.
The word “judgment” has been turned into a dirty word nowadays. Non-Christians have used it as a go-to attack in an attempt to paint believers as pompous jerks. Christians themselves are afraid of the word, and more importantly the act itself. While it’s true that we as people shouldn’t constantly be judging everybody, we absolutely should be judging every decision that we possibly can. As a matter of fact, most people already do.
You clicked on this column. You made a judgment call. What are you drinking at your desk right now? Coffee, tea, maybe water? That’s a judgment call. What kind of car did you drive into the office? A Government Motors rattle-box or maybe a tightly engineered Honda? Judgment call.
To have ever admitted to making a mistake, is to have made a very clear-cut and final judgment.
See, we make judgments every day. People get touchy, however, when we apply those judgments to the decisions that actually matter. Nobody has a problem with somebody making the judgment that playing in traffic is bad for you. If that same person says that pre-marital relations with innumerable strangers is also likely a poor decision… it’s now considered to be terribly “judgmental.” Or in the case of Erick Erickson, if one says that men and women are physiologically different and that a child ideally needs both, you are now both judgmental and sexist. Make sense? Don’t worry, it shouldn’t.
Even worse, many of us teach our kids that it’s wrong to judge. Then, ironically, we pray and hope that they learn to make good decisions throughout their formative years. This is what in technical terminology is referred to as, “goofy, dumb-dumb talk.”
I only wish that the willful mothers of our country’s fatherless children had been briefed on the importance of judgment. I wish that the seven million prisoners in the United States had been taught how to judge early and often. If we had fewer hang-ups about who might be offended by our judgment, and were more concerned with making sound decisions, maybe we could actually better some pretty rough lives.
Instead, we allow childish, societal memes to take place of good judgment. People often say, “The Bible says not to judge!”
Dumb. Let’s see the whole verse.
“Judge not, lest ye be judged.”
Guess what? Ye be judged.
Even worse, we allow young and/or ignorant people (in an attempt to justify their horrible association) to use the excuse, “Jesus hung out with tax collectors and hookers!”
Firstly… good on them for putting tax collectors on the same playing field as prostitutes. I’m on board.
Secondly, no. Jesus hung out with former tax collectors and former hookers.
He told them to, “Go forth and sin no more,” not “Hey Mary, wanna meet for drinks tonight after you’re done hooking?”
Of course, as Christians, we don’t want imperfect people to avoid us due to a fear of constant judgment or a lack of compassion. Just as surely, those who consistently make the wrong decisions and do so with pride, probably shouldn’t feel all that comfortable in our company to begin with. I doubt that Mary would’ve have been comfortable breaking bread with the Messiah after squeezing in her four o’clock.
Call it a hunch.
Listen, I get it. Nobody’s perfect. We can’t change the mistakes that we’ve made, but we can always choose to do the right thing moving forward. We cannot do that however, without passing serious judgment on past decisions.
Carlos Gracie Sr. famously once said, “There is no losing. Only winning, and learning.” I believe that, but there can be no “learning” without judging.
Now, as per usual, I’m pretty sure that there are many of you reading this and are furious with me.
To you I say, congratulations … you’ve just made a judgment.